Monday, February 08, 2010

Intolerance=Ignorance

I was reading Marie Claire magazine this month and there is an article in there about a brave woman who lost 200 pounds, then gained half of it back. She is not a WLS surgery patient.

Here's the link for the article:
marieclaire.com/supersize

It's a good read, but the comment that was left is what concerns me the most. People that say this is the easy way out should be slapped. I know it sounds rude and I'm sorry, but they have no idea. My hubby was a person that thought this was the easy way out; sometimes I wonder if he still does. That all it would take is a little time in the gym and I'd be all better.

I'd tried it all before this. NutriSystem, Weight Watchers, Atkins......many, many others. I succeeded at some and failed at others, regardless I always gained back whatever I had lost, and then some. Which is why I made the decision in the beginning to tell very few people that I was getting banded. Some of my family didn't even know this is what I had chose to do untill it was already done.

Why do people think this is the easy way out? Has anyone seen the new commercial for the Realize Band? I think it's amazing! The first thing the gentleman on the commericial says is that if people think bariatric surgery is the easy way out, they're wrong. Which they are. Very, very wrong indeed. And it's also hurtful when people say things like that; what makes them so much better than me, have they never failed at anything?

I've told my family that they don't need to center my life around my band. I'm the same person I always was, just going to be healthier. Yes, there are certain things that I can't eat, but that doesn't mean that my family can't eat them. I knew what I was doing going into this. I also knew what to expect, good and bad. When people always ask me how much weight I've lost or what it's like, it creates a stigma for bariatric patients that I'm not comfortable with. It's great they're concerned with my weight loss and are curious at how I'm doing, but it feels like since I have a LapBand, I've become one......does that make any sense?

I had a bad habit going into this of not sticking to "diets". When I discovered they weren't going to work I abandoned them. Why stick with something that I know isn't working?

Getting banded really was the best thing that I've ever done. I was reading some of the other blogs and it has been mentioned that they wished they would have done it when they were younger. I'm 29, actually got banded when I was 28. The only issue that I have is that I wish I would have done this sooner. I got married when I was 26.....I don't even look like the same person anymore than in my wedding pictures.

I am so upset that people think this is the easy way out. Most of the time it's people that it's easy for them to diet, they lose weight by cutting soda out of their diet. They're the lucky ones. Do they honestly think that if we (bandsters) could do that we would, or that we haven't tried that before? I've also heard that we make ourselves victims by saying that we can't lose weight in conventional ways. How are we victims by making lifestyle changes and taking control of our lives?

Has anyone else had this issue? That people treat you differently? Or they think you only did this cuz you're "lazy", "looking for the easy way out", etc?

*whew* That felt good. Sorry about that everyone. I just have a difficult time with people that spout off about things they know absolutely nothing about. If you ask me, it's intolerance to our way of life. Intolerance=Ignorance.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

My friends support me and my decision, but I think that some do think it is the easy way out. I'm only 2 weeks out from surgery and I feel like they think I should be losing faster, even when I try to explain that isn't how LB works. Sigh. It definitely isn't the same experience as when I joined Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers, that's for sure.

I'm enjoying your blog!

LoseIt!

Dirttrackdiva said...

Support is HUGE! My biggest support person has actually been my mom. She got banded with me. Same day, same doc. We've taken this journey together. It's been great! It's really nice to have someone that close to me that understands what I'm going through that I can talk with face to face. Blogging and the friends you acquire doing that are also a huge factor.
We're like our own little community. A little bandster family. There's actually quite a few of us. People that aren't banded can't really understand. And they shouldn't try. It's a totally different way of life than not being banded.
Hang in there. It only gets better from here. I promise.

Dinnerland said...

I feel you and I know so many of us are resentful when people say that our surgery is the 'easy way out.' F-them.

Here is the conclusion I've come to--if you can't beat them, join them.

I've got a weight problem, you see... and if I had cancer, or diabetes, and I had surgery to remove the cancer or took insulin shots each day-- some dumbass might say THAT was the easy way out. Should I just pray that I would be better from the cancer and eat organically or eat less sugar to keep the diabetes in check? Isn't treating an illness just "taking the EASY way out?"

To some extent, even though my examples above are totally absurd-- this is the truth at its core.
Bariatric surgery does provide an 'easier' way out than continuing to struggle unproductively against our insurmountable weight issues.

So: when I encounter someone who says its the easy way out-- I am not sure what I'll say, but I might just say, 'yeah, I suppose if that's what you'd like to think-- but at least I'm losing the weight and getting healthier-- I would have done anything to get here and I'll keep doing it."

I hope this makes sense, I feel very passionately that the jerkoffs who are critical of weight loss surgery are those who simply do not understand that there are people who need much more help than a 'diet' can every give....I know I am one of those who really needs the WLS, as demonstrated by the struggle I am now facing in the early post op phase of little to no restriction.

Sorry I've babbled on so long....
all the best-- Vanessa

Dirttrackdiva said...

YOU GO VANESSA! I think you and I are going to get along just fine. ;)

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