Friday, June 18, 2010

Happy Bandiversary to Me (a Couple Days Late)

First of all, let me start by saying, holy supportive comments batman!  You ladies are like a good bra.  :)  And believe me, I know the value of a good bra.  :)  In all seriousness though ladies, thanx heaps for all of your support.  Things are getting a little better around my area and I'm starting to claw myself out of the hole a few feet at a time while trying to keep the dust out of my eyes.

Wednesday, the 16th, was my one year bandiversary and here is a list of some of the things I've learned in the last year, band related and non band related:
  • This is not the "easy way out", "chicken exit", "lazy mans diet", "eat less, move more", "it's all about portion control", "you choose to be fat, all you have to do is put the food down and exercise" and all the other bullshit I've heard from nay sayers that know nothing about this in the last year.  To those people I say, kick rocks!
  • Being banded has changed who I am and how I live my life.
  • This blogging community and the people I've met here are very much like a surrogate family, and even though many of us have never met we know we have friends for life.
  • My mom (my original bandster sister) rocks!  OK, that's not something I've learned in the last year, I've always known it, but just thought I'd throw it out there.
  • I really miss sugar free Red Bull.  My doc is a no carbonation at all, ever doc. 
  • I actually can clean my house and my car and keep them that way.  Who knew?
  • I am stronger than I have been giving myself credit for and would do well to remember that in times I feel I'm not worth it.  However, still not as rock solid as my mom.  She's a hoss folks.  The things she's done and accomplished in her life.  If I'm half as strong as her when I die, I will have accomplished everything I've ever wanted.
  • I can slow down.  Take a couple of days to just chill out and take a breather and the world as I know it will not come to an end.
  • I'm on the fence about kids.  Sometimes I want them and sometimes I don't.  However, I do know that there is something to be said for being the cool aunt that buys whoopie cushions, bicycle horns, drum sets, and other obnoxious toys that bug the shit out of the parents of said child, and wires the kids up on sugar and sends them home.
  • The day you have any type of bariatric surgery really is the first day of the rest of your life.  There are so many things you can do within losing just a small amount of weight that you truly become a different person. 
  • I have knees, and ankles.  Didn't know that when I was fat(er).  It was just all kinda one unit.  Cankles.  Sexy.  Ummmmm.....not so much.
  • I want to help people.  I want to do whatever I can to get the word out about bariatric surgery to anyone I can.  I want to become an advocate for this cause and make sure that anyone thinking about it knows it's not going to be easy, but the rewards and benefits far outweigh anything else.
  • I'm very sad that my grandpas and my great grandma couldn't see how I've made this difference in my life and want to make a difference in the lives of others.  For they passed away years ago when I was still too young to really make an impact on society.
  • Being too tight sucks.
  • Being too loose sucks.
  • Unfills suck.  They suck more when you get too much taken out and can eat like the band isn't even there.
  • Retaining water makes a GIANT difference on the scale.
  • Accountability is a crucial part of this process.
  • Going to the races and walking around is a lot easier when there's 50 pounds less of me to carry.  Does that mean I can buy more stuff?  Jury's still out on that one.  :)
  • I actually look pretty damn good with purple hair.  Again, who knew?
  • My friends didn't see me as a fat person.  They just saw me as me and didn't really notice all the extra weight.  When I tell people what I weighed before they are shocked and many times don't believe me.  Which says a lot about the few people I allowed into my life and allowed to see the real me.  They thought I kicked ass anyway.  Wow, thanx guys, really, thanx.
  • It's pretty hard to enjoy life when you're so unhealthy you're doing good to roll out of bed.
  • I'm not so afraid of needles anymore.
  • When you eat smaller amounts of food, you want those foods to be good.  Like, really good.  I'm talking steak and lobster good.
  • People notice you a lot more when you're not busting your ass to just blend in and disappear.
  • Being an adult sucks.
  • Support is a huge part of this journey.  If you're reading this and you're thinking of getting the surgery and have no support at home, reach out for it.  Come here.  We will support you! 
  • I have no regrets of doing this.  Even with a couple of unfills and missing my Red Bull, I would still do this all again, on a dime.  No doubts.  Absolutely do it again.
  • I think I've finally figured out the reason why I did this.  Originally it was so I could get healthy enough to have a baby.  See above regarding that.  I know lots of you have kids and have said you did this so you could play with your kids and not be out of breath.  Great reason.  I realized that I'm kinda selfish though.  I did this for me.  So my back wouldn't hurt, so my knees wouldn't hurt.  So I could keep up with my nephews and my niece.  To be noticed.  To get a better quality of life.  And to make a difference.
  • I think this is my calling.  To make a difference in the world of bariatric patients.  Maybe that's why I've taken forever to finish school and for some unknown (at the time) reason I gravitated towards the medical field.  Maybe that's why many bariatric patients do.  I'm going to be a huge part of turning this around for people.  Making sure insurance companies know that it's not our choice to be fat.  I don't know yet how I'm going to do this, but I know that I will.  I will find a way. 
  • I never really knew who I was till I got banded.  I thought I knew, turns out I was just full of shit.  All those years of thinking that I knew who I was.  Only to get banded and realize I knew nothing about myself.  Hmmm.
  • People are shallow.  Even though I love being noticed, it's odd that people never noticed me when I was fat(er).  But now, I get doors opened for me, people smile at me on the street.  Weird, just weird. 
  • Hubby has recently started noticing me in a different light and seeing me differently.  Even though he was against this when it started, he's coming around and is happy about the differences this has made in my life and how much better I feel.
Well, I guess that's all I have for now.  Happy posting y'all and don't forget to wish your fathers a Happy Fathers Day.


-Grace- said...

Happy belated Band-iversary!!! I love this post---very inspiring :)

Amanda Kiska said...

Happy band-iversary! I love your list. I hope you get to work with bariatric patients in some capacity. You would be so good at it!

Lap Band Groupie said...

OK, totally AWESOME list. I'd suggest 'spin art' for the next Aunt gift...makes you really popular with the Mom's. 'Being an Adult sucks' my personal favorite. Happy Bandiversary sweetie!!! Can't wait to see how you pay-it-forward...I have the same need.

Kinzie said...

This was a great post. You sound very in touch with your feelings and where you are going. Up I say!

kagead said...

Fantastic Post! When you're ready to start your world-wide band advocacy tour, let me know. I'd love to be your press agent. :)

CC said...

congrats! and this was an awesome post!!! i'm going to keep a copy of it and look at it when i need a boost :-)

btw if you are in need of an energy drink, there is one by rockstar that is not carbonated and is low carb/no's in a yellow can w/ a black top and it tastes like lemonade! :-)

Sandy said...

Happy Bandiversary. Loved your points above especially in finding yourself with all these new abilities. You go girl!

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